Expectations

I remember chatting with a friend a few years ago and she looked very down in the mouth, "What's wrong?" I asked her, "I'm suffering from expectations!" was her reply. I loved this answer, it was so honest and demonstrated that she was taking 100% responsibility for the experiences in her life.

I had a bout of expectations at the weekend. It was my 50th birthday party, well actually it was a 90th birthday party as I was celebrating it with a close friend who was 40. He very generously had lent me five years so were saying we were 45 each! Anyway, here we are in the south of Spain, two very good friends had lent us their magnificent villa overlooking the marina and I had built up in my mind this wonderful party around the pool. Sunshine sparkling on the water and a balmy evening with us outside under the stars.

It rained! Not only did it rain, but it rained cats and dogs and horses, and donkeys and mules! At the same time it blew, a lot, rather like the wind tunnels that they test cars in. Get the picture?

Where were my expectations then? For a while I got very disappointed and because of that wasn't really enjoying myself. I was like the little girl who won't play 'cos it's not the game she wanted. All I could focus on was the fact that it wasn't as I had planned. Luckily someone pointed out early on that I was surrounded by the same good friends who would have been outside had the sun shone, and instead were all around a roaring log fire and were having fun. At that point I was able to drop the bout of expectation I was putting myself through and join in the party – and it was fun!

Where do your expectations trip you up in life? What are they stopping you enjoying or participating in? How different would your every day experience be if you weren't caught up in the expectation of how it should be? Can you drop them and join the party?


If you would like to explore how coaching can empower you to create what you want in your life please feel free to contact me to arrange a time for me to call you for a free introductory session. Tel +34 958 639 593 or click here to email me

If this message has sparked your interest and made you think then please feel free to leave a comment - the more the merrier. If you would like to be informed when a new blog is posted please sign up for the blog alert by clicking the link (above to the right) or email me with Alert in the subject line.

If you would be interested in attending the Breakthrough to Success seminar mentioned in previous blogs the next one in London is in June and there are quite a few happening in Australia and New Zealand this spring. please click this link and you can enrol for free for the next event in either the UK, Ireland, USA or Australia. Please feel free to pass this invitation onto as many people as you like.

How we see the world

Our world is as we see it, that is a statement that is made a lot by people nowadays. What does it mean though? Does it mean we can make our own judgement on what we see happening in the world? Or perhaps it means that we give our own meaning to what we see happening. Either of these statements is true but there is also a literal meaning to this.

We have over 2 millions bits of information coming towards us every second of every day. Now if we were aware of all those bits of information we surely would go mad. In fact we only become aware of around 130 bits of information per second. What happens to the rest? Well, we filter it out. Our attitudes, beliefs, programming, decisions, memories language, values and even our energy in this time space continuum act as filters to most of this information coming our way. We even have this in our language – the phrase of the 'rose tinted glasses' allude to the filters in front of our eyes.

So truly, yes, the world is as we see it and we see it through our own personal, individual, unique filters. No wonder we can't agree on what is going on! However once we are aware of this filtering process we can become aware of the filters we have. And, once we become aware of them we can change them.

A good friend of mine, Matt, told me a story that is a great example of once you start looking for something, then you often notice it more than you ever did before. He told me that his next-door neighbour was building a birdbath in his garden and using a whole load of little broken off tiles. Matt asked him where he got the tiles from and the neighbour said from the street corner – there is lots of building going on and they are everywhere. Now Matt had never noticed this before and said so but the neighbour said that because you weren’t looking for them. Ever since that day Matt sees hundreds of little broken off tiles in street corners. Once it entered his awareness he could see them, whereas before he simply didn’t have that filter on his vision.

This applies to everything in our lives. And the great thing is that once you get this idea you can begin to see the filters you have in place that don’t serve you very well. Are you looking for triumph or disaster? Abundance or lack? Laughter or sadness? What filters do you have running right now? Are they serving you well? Would you prefer some new ones?

What are you seeing in front of your eyes?


If you would like to explore how coaching can empower you to create what you want in your life please feel free to contact me to arrange a time for me to call you for a free introductory session. Tel +34 958 639 593 or click here to email me


If this message has sparked your interest and made you think then please feel free to leave a comment - the more the merrier. If you would like to be informed when a new blog is posted please sign up for the blog alert by clicking the link (above to the right) or email me with Alert in the subject line.



If you would be interested in attending the Breakthrough to Success seminar mentioned in previous blogs the next one in London is in June and there are quite a few happening in Australia and New Zealand this spring. please click this link and you can enrol for free for the next event in either the UK, Ireland, USA or Australia. Please feel free to pass this invitation onto as many people as you like.